WHAT IS IRRITATING ME TODAY – SMALL MELTDOWN

It has been a long time since I lost it and went on a rant. What I am going to discuss today will not be popular with all and for sure will not be agreed by my closest family members. I call it ” the Google Eye taking over my life and soul”. Google Eye is a term that I coined for my partner ol’ Bubbaloo. It refers to all forms of electronic gear that, in the past ten years, we find that we cannot live without. I mean cellular phones, iPads (tablets), laptops, book readers, iPods, (if they are still in use), smart watches and even large desktop computers. I classed them all as one so that when I speak to my wife, I can use one term to describe all of her appliances. So whenever I use this term in today’s article, you can substitute any of the current gadgets that you are addicted to.

What I first viewed as a modern convenience a few years ago, has now become inseparable from our lives. How we could fall prey to this Google Eye (substitute any or all of your gadgets) and become so deeply addicted to it’s (their) use, is something that I would never have imagined. I find myself within inches of this Eye, waiting to spy on me 24 hours a day, and I am by no means the worst victim in this family or even in my circle of friends. It is making me paranoid. I feel that this Google Eye can see deep into my soul and little by little it is sucking my soul out of me thru my eyes. The more I stare into it, the more it seems to say, “look deeper, look deeper, you need me”. I can barely function without it peering at me, whether I am awake or asleep. I find myself waking in the middle of the night to this eerie light emanating from the position next to me in the bed. Sure enough it’s my partner. Her use now extends to 20 hours a day, leaving her little time for sleeping. We now eat our meals with one form or the other of the Google Eye by our sides.

In a social setting, I find it hard to have a conversation where someone does not get a text, a call, or must immediately check the voracity of what you are saying, or explaining, or even when you are repeating something that you recently heard. I find it removes the social part of meeting and chatting amongst friends. Family does not need to ask how are you, what’s new or use any other form of greeting, because they already know everything you ate, drank, thought, did, and how many steps you had on your walk that day. They already know this because you have been in some form of constant communication 24/7’s. You can no longer go to the pub for a quiet drink with the buddies, because the Google Eye is there in your pocket just waiting to remind you when to go home, what to have, how many and that someone, not there with you, is missing you dearly, and you need to get home. This after two hours.

I could go on and on, but the more I do the more I start to lose it. I find that now, the google eye follows me into the can and watches me as I do my business. It knows every move I make and wants more. Not content to have me addicted 15 or 16 hours a day, I now find myself reaching for it during the night when I wake up. Has it ever got me out of an emergency situation, which was my primary reason to get a small Google Eye in the first place, NOPE never. Did I live without 24/7 access to my inner being, for the first 60+ years of my life, without A Google Eye? YES I DID. Am I ever going to break away from this dependancy, NOPE, not unless I get a major intervention, one where Google Eyes are not allowed. Now the last thing I might add is that with the Google Eye in one of it’s forms or another, you no longer need a watch, radio, camera, calendar, doctor, newspaper, magazine, appointment book, telephone, fax or in most cases a photocopier or any book for that matter. When is the last time you looked at your old mom’s most tried recipes in order to cook anything? I say that everyone should be able to choose one Google Eye each, and that infernal machine should only be allowed to operate 4 hours each day, maximum! Problem is we can no longer do this, as it would send about 90% of the people in this world into major withdrawal. I close with this “Curse you Google Eye in all of your forms”!