THE CAR RIDE FROM HELL OR THE 20 HOUR LE MANS

This next little story ranks right up there with some of the most idiotic moves I have ever made (and there were lots to choose from). It involved a decision we had made regarding two of my older children. The time had arrived that my oldest girl, accompanied by her brother, was now old enough to visit us in Utah for a short holiday. She was declared not yet old enough to fly, but if we could come and get her then she would be allowed to return with us. Well we were young and invincible at the point, so did not see any possible issues that could arise. After all we had a long weekend. What could go wrong?

After all it’s only 1000 miles or 16 hours driving (for a normal person). I worked all day, but left at three in the afternoon so we could get an early jump on it. As usual Deysi had everything packed, snacks, food, drinks, girls, and clothes all loaded. I came home switched cars, just like a pit stop on tv (well a Peruvian pit stop, it takes an hour longer). About 5pm off we hurtled into the unknown. I didn’t know exactly how to get there but knew it was north of us. No GPS in those days. Just me, my co-pilot Deysi, a map and two kids who didn’t know what they were in for.

We did not have a well defined plan, but decided to drive until we were tired and then find a place to sleep, before carrying on. I drove first out of the north end of Utah and into Idaho. All is going well, and we are making pretty good headway. No one has asked for a bathroom break yet and Deysi is keeping the girls entertained. Ron loved to play games, Ange loved to have a snooze and distract here big sister whenever she could. They got along fine when Ange was sleeping.

Somewhere in the northern half of Idaho, we stop for fuel and everyone gets 2-1/2 minutes to stretch, go to the bathroom and go into the store too see if they can find something to spend their money on. Deysi is a trooper, she has those girls so organized that everything goes off like clockwork and soon we are back in the car and on our way. By this time I am starting to get tired and it is full on dark out. No traffic to speak of and not much distraction. I’m now starting to hammer the diet cokes. Both girls have faded into sleep now. Deysi is curled up and keeping me company.

The hours tick by with not much sign of convenient places to stay. We pass into the bottom half of Montana and I’m now starting to find myself fixated on points in the road. I’m talking to Deysi to keep myself from dozing off. One part of me is thinking I need to pull over and get some rest, the other part is saying push on you idiot, it’s less miles you will have to drive tomorrow. It’s about midnight and we are approaching Helena Montana. I’m thinking time for a rest.

Then, like a touch from a magic wand I get my second wind. I’m wide awake and focused, pounding down the highway, past Helena and onto open Montana hill country. At this time I don’t even know I’m tired, but when we make a fuel stop in northern Montana, I do know that I’m a bit shaky, I’m kinda vibrating. Just excited I guess, I can smell Alberta we’re so close! Now there is no way Deysi is going to get me to stop. I forge on and might say that I remember little of passing thru northern Montana.

Finally at about 3:30AM we reach the border crossing at Coutts, Alberta. I am instantly awake, after having a little period of blank, going thru Montana. Deysi is now starting to question my sanity and my ability to reason. I’m telling her, piece of cake, it was nada, etc. Clear immigration and we are into Alberta. The only other traffic we have encountered for the last few hours, consists of huge monster trucks hammering along at light speed. At this point we are into Alberta and only 4-1/2 hours from Mom and Dad’s in Red Deer. Ok let’s go there, I say. Deysi asks if I am ok to keep going. The answer is 100% no, however I am a H…d and we carry a small touch of insanity in our genes, mixed with a piece of stubbornness and a grain of irrationality, so we forge on.

Deysi is passing in and out of sleep. Not deep but fading in and out. I have permanent spots in front of my eyes and am hallucinating. The girls are starting to stir and I can see a glimmer of sunrise over in the east. I have now been behind the wheel for just on 12 hours. Calgary passes, with no memory, and we arrive at mom and dad’s for breakfast at about 8:00am. My old dad just looks out of the side of his eye at me and doesn’t say anything. My mom however is once again explaining to Deysi what a fool I am. I guess she thinks Deysi doesn’t know this already.

Mom wheels off to make breakfast, Deysi gets me a place on the couch to lay down, grandpa is entertaining the girls and all is well. Only now, my eyes are locked wide open! The last thing I’m gonna do at this point is sleep! Breakfast over we jump back in the car and head for Edmonton. We arrive there at noon after being on the road 16 or 17 hours. Yup one of my all time most brilliant moves. Two days later we pile two more kids in the car and head back. Geezus.