YEAR END MESSAGE 2020 – I’M STILL IN THE HUNT

Another eventful year passes and I am still kicking. It seemed that the last twelve months took a long time. One sure-fire way of slowing the acceleration of time, in your old age, is to go into isolation for a few months. And ol’ Bubbaloo and I did just that. From mid March thru mid July we kept to ourselves, avoided any suspicious looking Covid carriers and followed the rules. My what fun we had. After an early January golf breakaway to Mexico with a couple of buddies, the excitement fell off sharply.

By mid march we had a supply of toilet paper layed up, enough food for a couple of years and six cans of beer, in case I wanted to get a little crazy. To supplement our supplies and make sure we always had two years of stockpile in front of us, D2 paid a twice monthly visit to check us out and replenish anything we might have consumed. My plan during this time was to lose a few pounds, unfortunately we had so much food that it went the other direction. I hoarded my six beer, even fighting off an offer from Bubbaloo to sit and have a boys night with me and polish off my supply.

As much fun as she is, I can guarantee you she is no fun to drink with! She sees nothing redeeming in getting legless, telling tall tales, bragging about conquests, throwing up and them going to bed. Absolutely nothing. Instead, to help combat boredom, Bubbaloo kicked my ass out into the yard to fight the cursed Amazon Jungle. She was unrelenting in her dedication to ensure that I had no time to grow bored. Out I went each day, the door was slammed behind me and I was told that she would let me know when I had, had enough fun for the day. More than once I contemplated hanging myself up in one of those cursed trees. Once my bushwhacking was done and I cooked lunch and washed up, I was then taken for a “slow” walk, following in the trail of her walking group, the “roadrunners”.

Ange encouraged me to do something creative, hence this blog, and Ron enrolled me in “website building for the feeble of mind” school. Bubbaloo promised to read whatever came from my brain and ended up on paper; that is if it didn’t offend her stand on the inherent evil of men, and the righteousness of women. So to say I had no censorship or filter on my drivel, is not necessarily true.

Summer came and another of my happy times followed. Ange, Ron and Jered came home. We all met at D2’s for one of his epic feasts. This time it was the medieval dinner, in the middle of the table eaten in medieval fashion. What a pig-out it was. It was great to be around A and the grandkids. After recovering from D2’s blowout we headed to Quatsino, to visit Ron’s and JMW’s property. It was spectacular. We rented a house there and lived, isolated, in the community at the far end of Vancouver Island. Very remote but mystical.

JMW and I were pumped for fishing and crabbing. However, it appeared that the government notice, that self quarantine had been lifted, did not make it out to the “sound”. Therefore it appeared that all the seafood was still self isolating and avoiding any contact with us, whatsoever. Other than a measly rock cod and a humble crab, we did not catch anything. Geezus! All too soon this idyllic time was over and everyone returned to their lives, with promises to return for a blowout Christmas.

Fall soon arrived and, just as Deysi was planning a birthday visit to Alberta, the government issued another travel advisory and pandemic warning. This effectively killed her plans, dead in their tracks. I must say Deysi had a very good attitude about it and just sucked up her disappointment and got right back into her routine. Had it been me, on the other hand, I would have pouted and sulked for a couple of weeks. After 6 months of isolating myself from the golf course, we decided that I must join for the fall and winter in order to rescue any remaining sanity that I possessed, after months in quarantine.

The only sad part was that after 6 months off, I had to start golf all over as a beginner and learn again. Also after 6 months of nurturing from Deysi, I had virtually forgotten how to throw a fit and curse. After a few short sessions as a beginner golfer, it all quickly came back and soon I had my full repertoire of bad words and self abasement back. It was as if I had never left. As everyone who lives in this side of Canada knows, late fall brought a new round of isolation rules and regulations into effect. so back inside I went, where I remain to this day, other than twice weekly rounds of “socially distanced” golf.

Our big plans for a “full on” family Christmas disintegrated, one group at a time. Down to only Ange with us for Christmas. As the gathering got smaller so did my Christmas spirit. I had a major fit, decorating the tree, but was bullied into it, anyway. Once Ange arrived my spirits returned. She is the essence of Christmas and still pretty much a full on participant in the seasonal festivities. Together we made our Christmas dinner, baked cookies, and chocolates, exchanged stockings and watched “Home Alone” for our hundredth time. Deysi kept the festivities flowing and everything fun. I basically did as I was told and was really the voice of moderation and conciliation in all things.

Christmas Day we planned to go to Mount Washington and meet D2, A, M and Benhameen for a socially distanced hike. We thought it would be a wonderful way to get together, yet obey all the rules about “not really” being “together”. The drive up was really, really pretty. Seeing the snow on Christmas was so enchanting. We arrived, donned what remains of our winter gear and went for a short walk to meet D2 and family. Geezus was it cold. I walked about 100 yards and it all came flooding back. I remembered why I hated the beautiful, peaceful snowy scenery so much!

I almost froze, Deysi was freezing up fast and had slowed her walk to the pace of an Arctic Explorer pulling a full dog sled! Ange didn’t appear to mind so much, but might have been faking it. D2 and family soon arrive. The only one dressed for the climate was A, she had full on winter regalia. M, now an adult for 3 days, was dressed in a sweater, fashion scarf and booties, while Benhameen sported tight blue jeans and a light jacket. The temperature was 0, there was a light sleet coming in on the horizontal, everything was covered in snow, breath came out as vapour, and voices were loud pitched. There was a fog so we could not even see the skiers plying their trade a few meters from us.

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We exchanged baking packets, helped push a skier out of the snow where he had parked his car, told everyone how nice it was to see them and then all piled back into are cars for the descent into the golf zone. That my friends is a recap of year 2020 to date. If it sounds a little boring and uninteresting it is only because, it was. However we made it, Deysi has not yet taken me out while I sleep and Ange is committed to visiting with us “until we piss her off”, and she leaves for home. Well we still have 6 days left of this year for something big to break. Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!